Archive for June, 2007

Stress and the people I love

Wednesday, June 27th, 2007

A Tomorrow for us
Yesterday it was a chore
I tickled Lakota down on the floor
The day before it was a bother
I had her and her brother
The day before that had some stress
I had three kids put me to the test
Today it will be just the same
But only one child to play the game
Tomorrow will be another story
Because it will be just you and me

For the last several days, as well as a day last week I have been watching grandkids, and while watching Perrin several days a week is the norm for me (and therefore completely normal and sane) I have had the joys and horrors of watching Lakota and Devin. For the better part I have thoroughly enjoyed it. I love each child in different ways and in their own ways they bring me a certain contentment that I never knew existed. They also each have a special way of simply getting on my nerves; though that is something I can deal with in short bursts so generally goes unnoticed. Yesterday Lakota had to go back home, which I think was a good thing… While I will miss her till her next visit, I was also running out of patience. I think even she noticed it by the end of the day. I do not think it helped that I had a headache, and then it was topped off that I tried doing a few things online which should have taken only a few moments that ended up taking hours. I was a bit stressed to say the least.

Give me half a moment
Thirty seconds of silence
Is it too much to ask?
In Thirty seconds of silence
I just want to bask

I ended up going outside for several short bursts so I could just get a little peace of mind, which of course did not work as well as I hoped. Cletus and Usdi were underfoot and I worried about Lakota and Perrin inside. Though, I did get a short moment of Zen as I sat on the steps of the Patio with Squirrel (my gray cat) on my lap, Cletus at my feet, and Usdi sitting on the step next to me. I rubbed squirrel behind the ears with one hand, and my other one took turns scratching the chins of the dogs. That brief moment made me happy to be alive, as I got my thirty seconds of silence. When I went back in I had the vigor to grab Lakota, toss her on the couch. I then snatched Perrin and tossed him up on his cousin, then proceeded to give double SQUISHES and we all laughed and played till Cyndi and Amanda got back. It was then, I got another moment of Zen as I got to hug the woman I love…

A Garden of Emotion
I have a little basket where I keep all my thoughts
I pluck them one by one like tomatoes from the garden
Then gently place them in this basket hanging from my arm
They are put there side by side to protect them from harm
There are many different kinds like memories and emotion
I do my best to keep them all separated so they will not mix
But as I walk row by row sometimes my basket wobbles
And when this wicker box is full sometimes some will topple
Then tumble down to my feet, most are still OK
Though other times they may burst right open
So if I step in haste within such tomato paste
I too will fall

Cyndi has been overly stressed as of late and I am not 100% sure just how to help her, though I do my best to be there for her. I will not go into all the details of her stress, as that is not my place, but I do look forward to her life slowing down a bit so that we can find not just thirty seconds of silence together, but 30 minutes…no, not 30 minutes, longer, much longer. I love her dearly and waking up in her arms this morning was cause for me to wake up all wide eyed and chipper. I will do my best to give her the support she needs, as she is my support. I will do my best to love her with my all, because she loves me even more, and I will do all that I can to make sure that she is happy, because when I am with her, I am the happiest person alive.

Cyndi, I love you! I am here for you and I’ll help carry your basket…

Life Lessons: Sharing

Monday, June 25th, 2007

Learning to share I think is an important life lesson that can be easily lost upon an only child. It can be lost on children that have siblings too old to be at a playing age as well.

 Both points I think are proven in my two boy grandchildren. Perrin is an only child, and for the better part soiled because of it. All the toys here are HIS and if anyone touches them he has a fit. Devin has a sister, but she is a few years older then he is, and a girl, so most of his toys are his as well. Get these two children together and its nothing but child tears and parents saying now let him play with it as they point to the other child.

 Today I have Lakota over and she was playing with the blue car while Perrin was playing with the green one. He noticed that she had one that he did not have so in his reality there was no longer a green car at all and only a blue one. I would not let Lakota give it to him, rather I gave him back the green one but as the green one was seemingly now non-existent there was nothing but screaming and tears as he got a healthy dose of “you have to share”.

 15 minutes later and he is now in bed 30 minutes early for a nap, and hes only just now starting to simmer down from the fit flinging.

 Terrible twos indeed! And to top that off, I am going to do my very best to have Lakota or Devin over at least once a week for the rest of the summer so I can do my part in instilling such a wonderful virtue of sharing.

 Being a grandparent (or even a parent or babysitter) is a magickal thing, and I fully believe that, though it’s not always shiny white magick that TV and story books make it out to be. Though you can bet on me making it look what way if I ever get around to writing that Q sitcom ;)

The trouble with NO

Tuesday, June 19th, 2007

Perrin has learned the word NO and he knows what it means on many levels. I got to thinking how he learned the word and I think it bothers me.

I’m amazed that NO is not the first word that most children learn, as it’s likely the word they hear more often then any other.

As a babysitter I tell him NO more then I tell him YES, as when he can do something I say ‘you can do that’ and there is simply no yes about it. When he does something he should not be doing, he gets a stern NO.

As his Papaw I tell him NO more then I tell him YES as I simply do not have enough money to spoil him like he deserves (also see reasoning as a babysitter).

As a secondary babysitting tool the TV encourages NO more then it does anything positive. Even when something positive comes up, its rarely a YES that is given. In nearly every show (Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, DoodleBops, Dora, etc, etc.) when they come across a problem, it’s almost always multiple choice.

Is thing1 what we need to solve problemA? NO!
Is thing2 what we need to solve problemA? NO!
Is thing3 what we need to solve problemA? You betcha!

So really it’s no wonder that NO is one of the little guys favorite three words EVER, as he hears it time and time again, all day long.

I think I am going to try training myself to find alternatives to NO (nope, nada, not this time). Maybe even start up with words like MAYBE. I also plan on trying to work on YES a little more. Possibly by setting him up in scenarios that will require a more positive answer. Like giving multiple choices and picking the right one first.

I’m not really sure, but I do know that NO is an issue (with more then just my little munchkin). I mean, how can we build a positive future with so much negative reinforcement?

My two loves: Cyndi and Tennessee

Thursday, June 14th, 2007

Sweet Tennessee
Drove past Ohio and Indy with no regret
Left P.A. and Kentucky without a fret
I’ve been through Georgia and Illinois
Both those states to me, annoy
Not Michigan, Virginia or Caroline
Can compare to the one I love so fine
So in this state I’ll forever be
With my Sweet Cyndi, Tennessee

Over hills and knobs and mountains tall
I’ve hiked and biked or saw them all
Over lakes and creeks and rivers wide
I’ve waded, swam, or on boats did ride
In many other states I’ve done the same
But for apples to oranges they’re all just lame
There is but one state I’ll forever be
With my Sweet Cyndi, Tennessee

A little over two years ago I moved from Michigan to Tennessee to be with the one I love. This was likely the biggest decision I’d ever make in my life and I am very pleased that I did make the correct decision, Prior to actually packing my stuff up and hauling it through five states I only talked to Cyndi on the phone and have a few brief instances of seeing her on a web cam. Granted, we talked for thousands of hours on the phone (yes, thousands!) but up till that fateful day in the parking lot of Hardies, I had yet to physically meet her. But I guess, I’m not really writing about her, though, none of what I’m going to say later could have ever happened with out her (so for that I’ll be forever grateful).

I was born in Texas, then moved around a bit for the first two years of my life, then was raised in Michigan. I spent the better part of 30 years there and was happy with my life. One of the biggest joys staying up there was camping, hiking, fishing, and otherwise being outside in nature. I spent time in little forests and big lakes and loved every moment of it. I’ve been up upper Michigan, Ohio, Indiana, and even once got to spend a little time in Pennsylvania and Virginia. I positively loved the mountains in PA and always wanted to return there. I even, for a time, wanted to move, but could never have afforded such a transition, so I just pushed such notions to the back of my mind as flights of fancy.

Then once lazy afternoon I met this wonderful woman, Cyndi. We were a match made in the heavens, put together by the gods of love, as I’ve never found a more perfect match. There was a slight problem though, and that was the 5 state commute to go see her. So hell or high water, I sold my house and made the fateful trip I mentioned above. I didn’t get a chance to drive through Pennsylvania on the way down here, but that was really OK, I got to ride through Kentucky, and the two look pretty much alike, but neither come close to comparing the mountains here. I can feel the magick, I can smell it in the air, I can bath within its rivers, I can wade through it’s creeks and valleys. Not only did my heart of hearts find it’s home here, so did my body and soul.

So it’s in Tennessee, and with my sweet Cyndi that I want to spend the rest of my life, and this is where I’ll want my body to rest when I pass on to the other side.

Selling your house with Saint Joseph

Wednesday, June 13th, 2007

I’m trying to talk my mother into buying a Saint Joseph statuette so that she can bury it in her yard to sell her house a bit quicker. Though, I’m unsure if I’ll be able to actually talk her into it. You see she views the Saints pretty much as she views Fairies ~ figments of a fundamentalist mind.

I still think I can get her to give it a try, but in order to properly convince her I thought I’d better look up the information on it so that I’d just say “it works”. So I got to looking… my first results were misspelled so all I got were pr0n sites. My second attempt only found home buyer guides selling the statues for $10-$50 (yes, $50). I did not think I could use a sales page to base an argument on, so I kept at it.

I tried newadvent.com (a handy catholic encyclopedia) and they had no mention of him helping to sell a home so I thought all was lost. I hit Google again, and came across Snoops.com, and of course they encouraged the disbelief.

What I did find was, catholic-forum.com. I’m unsure how accurate the source is, but they did have the answers I seek, and I’d certainly trust them over some realty site.

Catholic Forum had this to say;

The tradition has been traced to Saint Teresa of Avila who prayed that Saint Josephconverts, and encourged her Discalced Carmelite nuns to bury Saint Joseph medals as a symbol of devotion, consecrating the ground in Joseph’s name. Remember, also, that Joseph was a man who knew about moving on a moment’s notice (e.g., the flight to Egypt), and providing for a home for his family. He also knows what it’s like to have housing trouble (remember the manger? and being turned away from the inns?), and so is likely to be sympathetic to people with trouble getting or leaving a home would intercede to obtain land for Christian

And while no other ‘reputed’ resource seems to have this particular function for the Foster Father of Jesus, it does seem to make sense that he would, or at least could help with the selling and moving of a home. Certainly better then Moses, it took him 40 years to get a new home *smirk* So now that I know the WHY of it, I still have to figure out the HOW.

First, we’ll need something to bury. According to all sources, including the catholic-forum page, a statue, and not a medal is to be used. I’ve no clue why, but *shrug* the thought form guiding this endeavour certainly can’t be wrong, so a statue it will be.

Now figure out where to bury it… Most sources seem to point to the front yard (and under the sale sign, facing the home) though this response if varied as well. Personally I prefer the backyard, but this is not based on experience in the slightest. Others prefer one of the applicable cardinal points, which I’ll not bother lookig up.

Next you’ll need to know how to bury it. Again, most references indicate upside down. I guess that is get the blood rushing to his head and to give him a reason to hurry, but that’s just speculation. Other sources say he should be laid on his back/belly and face the house or the street. I guess just do what you feel is right.This

This step is likely the most important. You must now PRAY, and likely pay at least some tribute to this handy little Saint. All sources agree that is a MUST, well, I’m not sure all, but then, if someone told you to bury a saint and then not pray I’d personally assume it was assumed.

Various sites say that is should be removed once the deal is done (but never before) however not all sources say to remove it. I’d personally leave it there as a sacrifice… but what you want to do may vary.

I’m certainly not saying that Saint Joseph will help sell your house, but what could it hurt in trying, especially if you do believe in the saints? Even if you believe in God in general (bloody Protestants ;) ) it would likely work, as Joseph should likely hold at least some sway with the big guy, I mean he was the foster father of Gods son after all.

Good luck selling your home, and wish me luck in helping my mother sell hers.